In my other blog,Christian fiction i wrote a post about a young man who grew up fundinental Baptist. He ended up leaving and going more evengelical. He breaks up his engagement and they go there seprite ways only to meet up later on.
This got me thinking. What if they stayed together? I wanted to be examine these struggles. Can a relationship built on independent fundamental Baptist servive if one wants to leave it? What about there parents?
“When plans change.”
James ball grew up in an independent fundamental Baptist church. His dad was a pastor. He knew becca lynn for most of his life. They went from acquaintance to friendship and then from friendship to close friend ship. They then formerly began a courtship right before he went to bible colege.
He had gotten formal permisson to perpose marriage. She said yes. They started to plan there weading and lives and ministry together. Then things changed.
James grew up traditional. He was hardly armish. He liked the outdoors.he played non violent vidio games. He did not own a tv. He had no intetest ib tv or movies. He read from the king james bible and only listened to hymms.
Over time he became disillusioned with the i.f.b. he came to see that the i.r.b sometines took seperation too far. For james,there was one event that was the watter shed noment. The straw that broke the cammel’s back. His cousign was a non i.f.b. they had been very close. His cousign asked him to be his best man. There was ccm being played at thr wedding and reception. There was even dancing. His college sanctioned him for attending and participating. He gave uo his seat in the student government and resigned his post as a dorm supervisor.
He had graduated from the colege but a bit battered and blody. His star within the i.f.b was in discendence. He continued to be involved in his farther’s church. His firm beliefs began to buckle. Despite that,his relationship with becca remained strong.
Becca’s grandparents were missionaries to the philipines. Her farther was a deacon and sunday school teacher. Becca had admired jim for a long time. She saw him grow in his faith. People in the church saw them as a ligical couple. No one was surprised when they decided to formerly date.
When they decided to date.,they did so with the expextation that they would one day be maried. There church was also eagerly anticipating it.
She went with him to the weading. They both knew that it would not be an i.f.b cerimony. She knew he was brothered by the sanctioning. It was the gateway controversy that sent him into a frenzy. He tried to shield her from his personal reevaluation.
He had been distant from her. He avoided her at times. When they got together it was tense. There were moments of silience. She tried to engage him but he changed the subject. They were growing apart.
After weeks if little contact he asked her to dinner. “Bec i cant do this anymore. ” he said. “What cant you do?” she asked. “I feel stifled at gospel baptist church and the i.f.b in general. I cant abide by this rigidness. There are issues that are not speled out in the bible. I am leaving gospel Baptist church. I cant stay. I need to get away from gbc and the i.f.b for a while. “He told her.
“I knew that was a possibility. Where are we going?” she asked. ” i am going to try out my cousign’s church. I may check out a few churches. I dont expect you to go with me bec. This is my thing. I assumed you would stay at g.b.c?” he said.
“Oh no ! Where you go i go. Your new home church will be my home church. You go all evengelical so do i. “She said.
“About that.i think we should postpone the engagement. When we agreed to be maried, we were in a different place. I think we need to delay it for now. ” he said.
“No!i could not disagree more. I agreed to mary you. Not you the independent fundamental Baptist ninister in training but you. When you perposed i know you were having doubts. Dont push me away! I want to mary you no matter what. I dont want to delay it . i want to procede as scheduled. ” she told him.
“Look bec i dont plan to come back. I am leaving the i.f.b. i am a firm believer in the king James bible. That wont change. Other thing i may reevaluate. I may change. I am not sure getting ready for mariege under these circumstances is a good idea. I think you might believe that i am goung though a phase. I am not. I am not planing to return. “He said.
“I know that. I know you. I know how you are. I know when you have made a decison,you stick with it. I have no intention of trying to change your mind or talk you out of it. I want to go with you. Dont abandon me! Lets do this together. This can be an adventure. This will inpact our family. Your my family. Dont shut me out. “She said.
“You might change your mind. You might decide that you want to stay with g.b.c!” he said. “You have made a decison. You considered it carefully and thoughtfuly. You dont do things on the fly. I trust you. You are spiritual leader of our family.i trust you. Now i need you to trust me. I understand your fears. I may not fully like our new church. I will adjust. I dont want to postpone or delay our planed wedding. Please! “She pleaded.
“The thing is i am not sure i am doing the right thing. I am afraid i am not. I dont want to drag you into this in case i am wrong. I wish that the i.f.b would hold firm to king janes bible,separation,dress but mayby not be as rigid on other things. I am ok with not using power point. I Dont think power point should be associated with a carnal church. I think a pastor should ware a suit abd tie to sunday services. Whoever again if a pastor does not ware a tie,i Dont think it is evidence of carnality. It seems there is no third way.its fundimental or evengelical. I am a point in my life where is something is not bibically prohibited,i have no right to make it a mandate. I cant do it any more. I an not sure im right on this. If i go off a clif i Dont want to take you with me. ” he said.
“I knew thats where you were. Lets prayer about this. Lets be carefull. Lets do it together. Do you still want to marry me?” she asked.
“Of course i do. My feelings about i.f.b have changed. My feelings have not changed.i still love you. That has not changed. I do stil want to marry you.” he assured her.
“I am wiling to explore different churches with you. I will go where you go. Double minded man is unstable in all his ways. We do this we do this. No more talk of breaking off the engagement. This will be hard.i will be uncomfortable. This could be harder on me then it is on you. I can handle it. Promise me we are stil engaged?” she asked.
“Ok. We will do this together!” he said “no more talk of breaking off yhe engagement? ” she asked. “No more talk of a break up! ” he assured her. “Thank you. “She said.
He drove her home. She hugged him.they did not engage in a lot of physical contact but did engage in some. She held on to him. She kissed him on the cheek.something she did not not do often. They said there goodbyes.
That night he called his cousign. “Hi brandon its jim. ” he said. “Hey jim. “He said ” hey. Becca and i want to visit your church this sunday. We are considering making a change. “He said.
“I had a feeling that was the case. Please come on by. I am so glad becca is coming with you. No presure but you two would like to make a fine edition to the church.jess and i will save a seat for you. ” he said.”thanks” he said.
To be continued.