Holding hands part 11

Derek’s life canged a short while ago. While attending a penticoastal church,a pastor announced that he was to mary a young lady named lexi. He tried to rebuff it but it did not work. 

Now she had given it time to think.  She gave him time to reflect. He felt like he was getting no where. He wanted to marry her. He knew that. He just could not get pass how they met. He could not ligitimize it in his mind.  He felt he had to pass on this relationship.  Could he realistically walk away? Could he forget about her? 

It was now wendsday. The day of his curch’s midweek service. He came into it emotionaly exhausted.  He had not spoken to her sence sunday night. 

She tried to keep in the word. She tried to stay in prayer. It was proving a dificult task. She considered not going to the midweek service. She wanted to be there. She knew she should. 

 She went into the sanctuary.  Several greated her. They were becoming used to her presence. She was becoming part of there church family. Everyone was happy to see her..usualy that would have made her happy. Not so much today.  She wanted to be a part of the church family.  She did not want to jump in now. Just in case it did not work out. 

He saw her. She came over to him. “Hi !”he said. “Hi ! How are you?”she asked. “Good. You?” he asked. “Doing good. School is keeping me buisy. “She said. “I gues it takes alot of practice to get slain in the sprit. “He said. “I knew you were going to make a penticoastal joke.” she said. “I could not help it. Well i could have but i did not want to. “He said. “Im sure. “She said. 

Neither one knew what to say.she wanted to ask if he was close to a decison. She promised him two weeks.she should give him that. Things seemed straned between them. They tried to make the best of it. 

During the prayer time the man and women split into groups.  She considered not joining anna’s group.  She decided that would be rude. She enjoyed spending time with the women who would one day be her mother in law or would she? She was not sure any more. She did not doubt the word but could someone who did not believe in it be bound by it. 

“Hi anna!”lexi said. “Hi sit down. It is good to see you. I have missed seing you.”Derrek’s mom said. ” i have missed seing you. “She said. 

After praying ,they talked for a bit. “You know about Derrek’s and i deciding to take a break so he can sort all of this out. “Lexi said.”yes he did. “She said.

Lexi did not want to say much. She had no idea how his perrents felt about all this. They had given there permisson for them to date. They seam to welcome into the family with open arms but what would happen if he wanted to perpose. She had no idea. 

After the prayer time everyone returned to thw sanctuary. The pastor dismissed everyone. He walked lexi to her car. Lexi really wanted to just go home. As they were walking, his dad went over to her. 

“I had really got to say hi. How are you soinf alexa!”bryan aske.”i am doing fine. I am glad i couls come tonight.  “She said.”i am glad you did too.”he said.

They said there goodbyes. They arived at her car. “Well have a good night.”he said. “You too derrek.”she said.  She got in her car. He watched her leave.

She started to feel like it might be all over between them. She really thought he would chose to be with her. It looked like he really might not. Should she perpare herself for the eventuality that there relationship might end. Was she unwise to jump right into his world. It made so much sense. It seemed perfectly plausible. .now she was not sure.

She still beleved he was perfect for him..she loved him far more now then before. She knew that as long as the prophetic word hung over his head he would have a hard time embracing it. Mayby he never could.

Derek went home after she left. “So are you close to a decison?”his mom asked. “No not yet”derrek said. “Do you think you might consider not being with her?”his farther asked. “I dont see how i can. I cant justify how i can realy on a prophethic word. If i cant justify that,i dont see how i can procede futher.”derrek admitted. 

“If the phrophetic word had not occured, would you be debating this?”his dad asked. He thought about it. “No i would not. If i just met you gradualy. I would not debate it. He fact our meeting was based on that word. “Derek said.

“Then have you made up your mind?” his mom asked. “That is not what i want to happen.  I dont see any other choice. I cant see any other answer. ” derek said. 

“Lets take the word out of the equation for a minute. Do you want to marry her?” his dad asked. “Yes i do” he answered without any hasitation. He had not fully realize that until that moment. 

“That was what i thought. I thought that you did. One belief that is held by some belevers that if you want to do something its out of bonds. Sometimes it is. God works sometimes within our desires. Sonetimes the lord will put in someheart heart to go to a misson field long before they are comisoned to go. It is assumed that if you hate hot climates that is where God will send you.  That is not nesierily true. Perhaps the lord is working in your heart . do you believe that she could be your future wife? Dont think about the word for a while. !” his dad said.

“Without considering the word yes. Absolutely.  I do think that she could be my wife. ” derrek said. “Dont be so quick to dismiss that. Your mom and i see things about her we like. So has the church. We really like her. We think that she could be your wife. She has those qualifications and qalities. That is important.  ” his dad told him.

“We dont want to presure you either way. This could be one of the bigest decision of your life. ” his mom said. “I realize that. ” he said. 

Derek went upstairs. He went back in his mind to the questione he had not really considered. He ignored the question.  Now it was staring him right in the face. He did want to admit it. He did want to mary her. 

He was surprised by that. He was not expecting that. He knew he liked her.  He respected her. There was more. He felt confronted by it. There was no one else. There would never be anyone else. 

A part of him realy wanted to call her.  Tell her he did not need more time. He was ready to fully embrace her. He almost picked up his phone and called her. He could not do it. He felt he needed the next week to make sure. He decided not to rush in. She told him that when he gave her his answer,it had to be definitive. He should wait . he would. 

She regreted coming to his church that night. She wondered if she would attend his church on sunday. She even considered ending the relationship.  

She sat down and wrote an email to him. One she never set. “Derek i stil believe that God wants us to be together. I do not doubts the verasity of the word. Perhaps the will of God can be recisted. Perhaps the perfect will can be diagarded and give way to the permisive will of God. While it is regrettable God gives grace. I dont feal that we can go any furher. Therefore i am ending our relationship.  I will free you from this. I wish you well. I will always love you.  I wish i would have turned out differently.  It is because i know you so well that i know you wont acept this. I will miss you. Love always lexi. Ps i want to move on. I want us to be done.  Good day. ” she wanted it to be clear that they were over. She stared at the screen. She almost hit send. She could not do it. 

Then her laptop swiched to the screen saver. It was of her and derrek. He had his arm around her. She remembered when that picture was taken.  She stared at it. She pictured her life with him. Somehow he would come around. She felt in her sprit that she could not walk away. She would not. She put the email in her draft folder. She turned off her laptop. 

Derrek was realy confused. On the night she told him to take some time to consider this,  he really considered teling her it was over.  He decided to take that time. He looked froward to time apart from her. He was miserable.  He knew it,he was sure that lex knew it. He thought that his parents and family knew it. He hated this.  He hated being apart from her. He liked seing her at church. They were not in good felowship. He hated that. 

He stared at his phone. He looked at the contact list. He saw it say lex. He alnost presed it. He decided it was nit yet time.  

His devotions looked at biblical marriages.  He looked at jacob,racheme and leah. He looked at Joseph’s wife.  She was fasinating. She was an Egyptian. Hia mariege was brought about by mishaps. He found it fasinating.  The bext day he studied moses wife ziporah and his secvond wife. 

He was stil confused and time was slowly running out. He knew he had a week to go. He also knew that things he could not control were moving. In truth he might not have a week. 

End of part 11

 

.

When plans change

In my other blog,Christian fiction i wrote a post about a young man who grew up fundinental Baptist.  He ended up leaving and going more evengelical. He breaks up his engagement and they go there seprite ways only to meet up later on. 

This got me thinking.  What if they stayed together?  I wanted to be examine these struggles.  Can a relationship built on independent fundamental Baptist servive if one wants to leave it? What about there parents?  

“When plans change.” 

James ball grew up in an independent fundamental Baptist church. His dad was a pastor. He knew becca lynn for most of his life. They went from acquaintance to friendship and then from friendship to close friend ship. They then formerly began a courtship right before he went to bible colege. 

He had gotten formal permisson to perpose marriage.  She said yes. They started to plan there weading and lives and ministry together.  Then things changed. 

James grew up traditional.  He was hardly armish. He liked the outdoors.he played non violent vidio games.  He did not own a tv. He had no intetest ib tv or movies. He read from the king james bible and only listened to hymms. 

Over time he became disillusioned with the i.f.b. he came to see that the i.r.b sometines took seperation too far. For james,there was one event that was the watter shed noment. The straw that broke the cammel’s back. His cousign was a non i.f.b. they had been very close. His cousign asked him to be his best man. There was ccm being played at thr wedding and reception. There was even dancing. His college sanctioned him for attending and participating.  He gave uo his seat in the student government and resigned his post as a dorm supervisor.

He had graduated from the colege but a bit battered and blody. His star within the i.f.b was in discendence. He continued to be involved in his farther’s church. His firm beliefs began to buckle. Despite that,his relationship with becca remained strong. 

Becca’s grandparents were missionaries to the philipines. Her farther was a deacon and sunday school teacher.  Becca had admired jim for a long time.  She saw him grow in his faith. People in the church saw them as a ligical couple. No one was surprised when they decided to formerly date. 

When they decided to date.,they did so with the expextation that they would one day be maried. There church was also eagerly anticipating it.  

She went with him to the weading. They both knew that it would not be an i.f.b cerimony. She knew he was brothered by the sanctioning.  It was the gateway controversy that sent him into a frenzy. He tried to shield her from his personal reevaluation.  

He had been distant from her. He avoided her at times. When they got together it was tense. There were moments of silience. She tried to engage him but he changed the subject. They were growing apart. 

After weeks if little contact he asked her to dinner.  “Bec i cant do this anymore. ” he said. “What cant you do?” she asked. “I feel stifled at gospel baptist church and the i.f.b in general. I cant abide by this rigidness. There are issues that are not speled out in the bible. I am leaving gospel Baptist church.  I cant stay. I need to get away from gbc and the i.f.b for a while. “He told her.

“I knew that was a possibility.  Where are we going?” she asked. ” i am going to try out my cousign’s church. I may check out a few churches. I dont expect you to go with me bec. This is my thing.  I assumed you would stay at g.b.c?” he said. 

“Oh no ! Where you go i go. Your new home church will be my home church. You go all evengelical so do i. “She said.

“About that.i think we should postpone the engagement. When we agreed to be maried, we were in a different place. I think we need to delay it for now. ” he said. 

“No!i could not disagree more. I agreed to mary you. Not you the independent fundamental Baptist ninister in training but you. When you perposed i know you were having doubts. Dont push me away! I want to mary you no matter what. I dont want to delay it . i want to procede as scheduled. ” she told him.

“Look bec i dont plan to come back. I am leaving the i.f.b. i am a firm believer in the king James bible.  That wont change. Other thing i may reevaluate. I may change. I am not sure getting ready for mariege under these circumstances is a good idea. I think you might believe that i am goung though a phase. I am not. I am not planing to return. “He said. 

“I know that. I know you. I know how you are. I know when you have made a decison,you stick with it. I have no intention of trying to change your mind or talk you out of it. I want to go with you. Dont abandon me! Lets do this together. This can be an adventure. This will inpact our family.  Your my family. Dont shut me out. “She said. 

“You might change your mind. You might decide that you want to stay with g.b.c!” he said. “You have made a decison. You considered it carefully and thoughtfuly. You dont do things on the fly. I trust you. You are spiritual leader of our family.i trust you.  Now i need you to trust me.  I understand your fears. I may not fully like our new church. I will adjust.  I dont want to postpone or delay our planed wedding. Please! “She pleaded. 

“The thing is i am not sure i am doing the right thing. I am afraid i am not. I dont want to drag you into this in case i am wrong.  I wish that the i.f.b would hold firm to king janes bible,separation,dress but mayby not be as rigid on other things.  I am ok with not using power point. I Dont think power point should be associated with a carnal church. I think a pastor should ware a suit abd tie to sunday services. Whoever again if a pastor does not ware a tie,i Dont think it is evidence of carnality.  It seems there is no third way.its fundimental or evengelical. I am a point in my life where is something is not bibically prohibited,i have no right to make it a mandate. I cant do it any more.  I an not sure im right on this. If i go off a clif i Dont want to take you with me. ” he said. 

“I knew thats where you were. Lets prayer about this. Lets be carefull. Lets do it together.  Do you still want to marry me?” she asked.

“Of course i do. My feelings about i.f.b have changed. My feelings have not changed.i still love you. That has not changed. I do stil want to marry you.” he assured her. 

“I am wiling to explore different churches with you. I will go where you go.  Double minded man is unstable in all his ways. We do this we do this. No more talk of breaking off the engagement.  This will be hard.i will be uncomfortable. This could be harder on me then it is on you. I can handle it. Promise me we are stil engaged?” she asked. 

“Ok.  We will do this together!” he said “no more talk of breaking off yhe engagement? ” she asked. “No more talk of a break up! ” he assured her. “Thank you. “She said. 

He drove her home.  She hugged him.they did not engage in a lot of physical contact but did engage in some. She held on to him. She kissed him on the cheek.something she did not not do often.  They said there goodbyes.

That night he called his cousign. “Hi brandon its jim. ” he said. “Hey jim. “He said ” hey.  Becca and i want to visit your church this sunday. We are considering making a change. “He said.

“I had a feeling that was the case. Please come on by. I am so glad becca is coming with you.  No presure but you two would like to make a fine edition to the church.jess and i will save a seat for you. ” he said.”thanks” he said.

To be continued.  

Holding hands part 5.1

“you don’t have any doubts that I am the one?” He asked. “None! ” She said smiling. ” No even a little bit of doubt?” He asked. ” No none!” She said. ” You don’t want to Mary some penticoastal guy? ” He asked. ” No silly! It’s not God’s will. God made you for me and vice versa. That’s so clear to me. You complete me. You fill in my gaps. I believe I will compliment you and fill in some of your gaps. I am excited to be your partner your helper. ” She said.

 After a while they decided to call it a night. “Make sure you read my note around devotions time. Promise?” She asked. ” I promise. ” He assured her. “Good. Just making sure. ” She said. “We’ll have a good night lex. ” He said. “You too my love! ” She told her.she hugged him and kissed her on the cheek. He walked her to her car. She got into the car. He watched her drive off. He went back inside. 

“How was your visit?” His mom asked. “Really good!” He answered. “You really do like her?” She asked. He blushed a bit. 

 The next morning ,he took out the note she left for him. He unfolded the peace of paper. He unfolded it. He was nervous about reading it. “Good morning Bunnie. I hope all is well with you today. I hope classes go well for you. I hope you grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. I hope you feel his presence in a way you have not yesterday.i pray that you will seek him throughout the day. I know he will receipt himself in a vibrant way if you do. I will be thinking about you and praying for you though our the day. Don’t lose the sense of wonder.ilove you and miss you.i can’t wait to see you again. Love always in Christ Lexi.” 

She had this affect on him. He did not make sense to him. He could not deny that that she did. She had the ability to melt his heart. She did it quite frequently.

He read from romons three.he sent Lexi some of his thoughts. He focusedon verse 23 and. 24. “We sin and don’t meet God’s standards. What is more dismal then that? As I read 22 and 23,I realize that the propose of the verse is not to say mankind if horrible. Because everyone sins and constantly sins,all are equally guilty before God. God’s grace steps in.this gives us the ability to have pea r with God something impossible earlier. The tone changes in verse 24. We are all sinners who are guilty before God. We can have peace with God though his grace. Just some thoughts.” Then he sent the email.

Then he had breakfast. He drank coffee. Then he headed out. He headed to class. Lexinfor up as well. She read her usual devotions including call to glory the Baptist version of our daily bread. Then she read though romons and Matthew. 

Then she had a time of prayer. She spent a lot of time praying for Derrek. She found joy in praying for him. As she prayed things poped in her head to pray for. She loved that. 

She gathered her stuff. She went to the car. Her phone went off. There was a Facebook notice. She read it. It was a message form Derrek. She read it. She waited until she got to her campus to draft a response. 

“Dearest Derrek, peace with God seams to be something unatanible. How can mankind who does nothing but sin and violates God’s standards now have peace e with God? God’s Holly character bars him form simply excusing it. This sin had to be delt with. Int God’s grace because of the cross could achieve that peace. Thank you for that reminder! ”

She then sent it. She excited the car. She walked to the door of the college. She went inside. She went to the class room. She was excited for classes to begin.

He went to his class as well. He turned off his phone during classes. Classes concluded before noon. He had some time before classes resumed in the afternoon. He turned on his phone and read her message. 

“Hey lex, I forgot to mention that the idea of sin is nothing but sin. Not only do we chose the bad over the good but many times we choose the good enough over the perfect. I know I have don’t that. He could have wiped out Adam after he sinned. He allowed Adam to continue to exist and to have a chance at redemption.i am focused on this idea of peace with God. Talk to you soon lex!” He sent it. 

She saw his message right before she went to lunch. She wrote back right. Away. “Dere the ideaof how bad sin is has really hit me lately. Sense I was a kid I knew what sin was.i defined it as disobeying parents etc.like you said sin is also not doing what you know you should or simply doing the bare minimum needed to get byi know I have done better but certainly not the best. That is sin. I too am glad that we can have peace with God. Knowing how bad sin is bad sin ismakes grace more amazing. It really is mind boggling. Lexi sent it.

then she sent it.after lunch he checked his message s. Sure enough there was one from her. He read it and drafted a response. “Being a pastors kid it was assumed that I was a good kid. In the world standards I was. I probably was by church standard as well. This understand of a biblical definition of a church has altered my thinking. It is the reason for the change in me over the last few years. It brought me closer to the Lord. It has made me great full for all the Lord has done for me!”he wrote. 

She sent him a response just before her next class. “I had heard that there was a change in you. I am thrilled that the Lord has his hand on you. I know that you have surrendered your life to him fully. I see evidence that he is working in your life. Don’t let sin get you down. Let it instead make you great full of God’s grace. I know you love the Lord. I know you love God’s grace.sin should not bring us aaway form the  cross but to it. ” She wrote.

He did not get her message until after his afternoon classes were concluded. He saw it. A friend came over to him. 

End of part five. 

Holding hands part four

Derek stood at the steps for a few minutes. He had no idea how to explaine all of this to his parents. He did not think He should say that she was chasing him and he was letting her. He wished she would back off. She almost had them married. He knew that he could tell her that would not work out.
He knew why he had not told her that. He did not like that answer. He collected his thoughts .he took a deep breath and went inside.
He nervously opened the front door. He tapidly stepped inside. He walked further into the house. He got even more nervous. He walked into the living room. His mom and dad were there. His mom held his baby sister.
“I gues I have some exlaning to do. “Derek said.” we are a little confused. You met lexi at Tom and denise’ church ?”his mom asked. “Yes I did. ” he answered. “How did you too connect?” his dad asked.”well.. Tom and I were engaging in our usual banter. Lexi was sitting next to us. She found our banter humorous. We talked for a bit before the service. ” he said.
“There is something your not telling us. ” his farther said. “Yes there is. I am not sure how tell you this part. The pastor of the church said that the lord wanted us to be a couple. I am inclined not to believe in word from the Lord. She has embraced it whole heartily. Consequently she gas embraced me. I should discourage her but something keeps me from that. There is a part of me that wants her in my life. I am somewhat desirous of a relationship despite our many differences. ” Derek said.
He felt like time had stoped. This was hard for him to speak. He knew he had to tell them this. It was important that he would tell them this. He felt really exposed.
“So! Let me get this straight,a Pentecostal pastor gave a word that you should Mary this girl you met five minutes earlier. Now She is convinced that this is from the Lord. She has barely left your side sence. ” his dad asked.
“Yes. That prety much sums it up. “He said. “I see. Do do you Like her? “His dad asked. “Well I gues I kinda do. She is very sweet. She is caring. If I feel the word is problematic. ” he said.
“I understand your concern. Have you asked her to back off?” his dad asked. “No I have not! I am not sure how to word it. Is m not sure how to. I do not want to hurt her. I suspect she is s bit insecure. ” he said.
“Are you interested in a long relationship with her? ” his farther asked him. “I don’t know. I am feeling a thousand different emotions. I am having difficulty sorting this all out. ” derrek said. “You want to like her. ” his mom said.”perhaps” Derek said.
“I want to do what is right. If you ask me not to see her,I will hornor that. ” Derek said. “We know that . she seams like a nice person. We would like to know her more. You should not run right into this. Perhaps you should not run away from it as well. You have not dated anyone in quite a while. You have been waiting .” his mom said. “I felt I needed to focus on training for ministry. ” derrek answered.
“What do you feel about lexi?”his mom asked. “I don’t beve that I cannot go further with her. I don’t know that I have Clarence to proceed. ” he said. “We would like to get to know her more” his dad said. “Ok.” he said.
Later that night,he called his brother. “Hi Tom!”Derek said. “Hi Derek”Tom said.he told him all that had happened between him and lexi. “Have you talked to mom and dad about it?” Tom asked. “I did. They were surprisingly calm about it . it seems that they want to give her a chance. ” derrek told him.
“Look Rick you have been sending her mixed signals. If you don’t want this you need to tell her. You cannot leed her on if you have no intention of seeing this through. If you don’t see this as a possibility, end it now. She will be heart broken but it will be better now then later.” Tom said. “I will consider your words. ” Derek told him. “Please do. Denise and I think a lot if lexi. She would make a great wife for you. You two make a cute couple. I know you are reluctant to accept that this is from the Lord.don’t be quick to reject it.”Tom said.
Derek had no idea what to do. He read his bible played and then went to bed. He tried to collect his thoughts while trying to fall asleep. He could accept the word being from the Lord. He felt gravitated towards her. He had no idea why. He could embrace her yet. He finally fell asleep.
“I don’t think I have ever seen Rick so nervous. ” Anna Carlson said.”reminds me of when he was younger and did something wrong. “Bryan Carlson said. “He really thought we was going t be upset with him. ” his mom said. “I am not ready to discount them as a couple. ” Bryan said. “Nor am I.” she said.
“Derek should be skeptical of a personal prophecy but God cod be bringing then together. ” Anna said. “I think so too. ” he said.
Derek got up the next morning. He took out his bible. He found a note from lexi. “Hi babe. I hid this in your bible when you were not looking. I am praying for you to be who the lords wants you to be. I hope you feel your his presence In a dramatic way. I hope I can a help in that journey. Have a great day. Be strong in the Lord. Love always lexi” she said. He could not help but smile. She always appeared to have that affect on him.
Lexi had been praying for her future husband for a while now. She believed that he was out there. Now She was certain that she had met him. She now had a face and a name.  She was elicited that she could pray for him more intelligently. She thanked the Lord for being able to have met him. He was gratefull for now knowing who he was.
They both had classes that day. He had breakfast he got some code for the road. He left the house and hoped in his car. He headed for the campus.
They both had classes most of the day. They both had buisy days.he got home just before supper. Derek was a straight A student.he had to work hard to maintain it. It was naturally a great student. She had a 4.0 g.p.a.
While Derek was at school ,his mom called Tom.”I assume your calling about Derek?” Tom remarked. “I had no idea that this was going to happen. I promise this was not some kind of scam. I know your feelings on this sort of thing. Pastor Jeff would not have communicated it if he did not believe it. He is a sincere person. ” Tom said.
“Do you know lexi well?”his mom asked . “yes. She is very involved in the church. She is a very godly person. ” he said. “We got to meet her. She came to church last night. ” she said.
“I think that they would make a great couple. ” Tom told her. “Dad and I want to get to know her. They do seam to have a connection. ” she said.
Derek got out if school right before super. He drove right home. He got home and went to the dinner table. “Well If it is not Mr. I am in a relationship with lexi graves. ” his dad said. “You saw that. ” Derek comented. “Yes we did. There are numerous comments. ” his mom said. “I don’t know we can make this work. I really want to try. ” Derek said. “We want you to Mary someone who is saved.we want her to be someone who is serious about her work with the Lord.someone who will be a partner in the work of the Lord. Someone who a consistent walk and shows sign of continual speituel growth. From what I have seen it appears that lexi meets that critera. ” he said.
After dinner,Derek checked his Facebook. He had a lot of notifications . he clicked on the updates.
“Congratulations! I can’t wait to meet you lexi.” his maternal grandmother said. “So happy for you Derek. Lexi hope to meet you soon.”his paternal grandmother said.”hope to meet you soon Derek. Congrats alexa” from her step mom. ”  there were a lot if comments.
His phone went off. “Hi hunnie. I missed you. ” she said. “I missed you. ” he said. ” I am on my way home. Can I stop by?” she asked. “Yes of course. ” he said to her. He could yell she asked It in a slightly nervous tone. “Great I will see in a few minutes. ” she said. “See you then” he said.
He walked towards the door. ” Lexi is coming over on her way home. ” he said. “Oh ok. ” his dad said. He opened the door to the porch . he waited for her to arrive.
End of part four.

Holding hands part three

Derek listened to two leading fundamental preachers from the past . there messages were a archived on you tube. It helped him to calm down. He heard s phone beep. He picked it up. It was a notification from face  book. It was a New friend request.
He clicked on it. It was from lexi. He immediately accepted it. He clicked on her profile. Her religious preference was Christian-Pentecostal. She was a member of the republican party. Her likes included k-love, various ccm artist, evangelical and Pentecostal figure. She enjoyed classic book and some fiction. She liked a few tv shows including star trek.
He wondered how they mesh there words In a way that would be pleasing to the Lord .
Then he stoped himself. He could not believe that he even entertained the idea that he could marry this person. He wondered if he would even see her again. He realized he had gone though every minutiae of her profile. He thought to himself that he must really be losing it.
She was execited when she saw that he had accepted her friend request. She was eager to look at his profile. His religious preference was Christian Baptist. He was a republican. He liked sacred Christian music. His hiroes were Dr. Bob Jones Sr, David cloud, Ian pasley. He was a fan of the king James bible,pilgrims progress and a book called daktar.he was a sports fan. She wanted to understand him. The man who would be her husband.
His phone went off again. He looked it over. It was a relationship request from lexi. His first inclination was to decline it. He really did not want to hurt her. His parents ,grand parents and tethers might see it.
He wanted this night to be over. He hopes to fall asleep and wake up and find that none of this happened. He knew that it had.
He stared at his screen for a few seconds.he hit the accept button.then he turned the phone off.
“Why’did this happen ?” he thought to himself. “If only if I said no to Tom. ” he had held out for quite a while. Why did he have to relent tobight? He prayed before he went to bed.he asked the lord to sort it all out. He asked that whatever happened that HE would have the preeminence.
She was thrilled that he had accepted her friend request.she was even more excited that he had accepted her relationship requests. She wanted to get to know him more. She prayed for him.she prayed that he would be the person the Lord ment him to be. She could not wait to see him again.
The next day was Sunday. Derek woke up. He got ready for church. He wondered if anyone saw his updates on facebook. He went to the kitchen table. “Morning!” he said . he was greated by his parents and siblings. His youngest sister was in the high chair. Either no one had notice or they were not going to say anything.
That day Derek had not heard form lexi. Derek taught Sunday school that day. After church he helped his younger brother work on a model air plane. Then his dad read from a missionary book. Then they got ready for the evening service.
Lexi got up.she went to her church.her church did not have a Sunday night service.she decided to go to his church. She wanted to get acclimated to thus world. She found she really wanted to see him.
He went into The church. He walked inside. He got some of the soynd equipment ready. He heard a voice in the distance. It sounded Luke lexi.
He wondered if maybe he was just hearing things. He turned around.sure enough it was her. She was talking to a younger lady in the church. He decided to walk over to her.
“Hi lex!” he said. “You know this young lady?” Marsha haglin asked “yes I do!” he said.
After they were relatively alone, she kissed him on the cheek. It made him nervous when she did that.even more so hear. He probably should have said something at The coffee shop but he did not. Now he did not want to hurt her feelings.
He suspected that she was very sensitive. He did care about her. She took his hand.they walked to a pew. “I missed you!” she said.
“I had no idea that you were coming tonight.” he told her. “I wanted to surprise You. My church doesn’t have a Sunday night service so I decided to come hear. I need to get more familiar with your church. Some day this will be my church.” she said.
He had no idea how to react to all of this. She seemed to believe that there getting married was a sure thing. He suspected she might even believe they were married at least I. God’s eyes. She feared She might be moving way too fast. She was passed the question of who. She now wanted to plan there lives. He was not there yet.
“Do you read call to glory?” She asked.”I do. Good stuff. I usually read it in the morning.” he said.”I picked one up. I love to read.” she said.”I read the devotional and a passage in the morning. At night I have been reading though psalms ” he said.
“I have been reading though a Pentecostal devotional book. As well as a pasege of scripture. At night I read a different passage. ” she said. “I like to read. I am not sure I am an avid reader.as a pastoral student I don’t really have a choice. ” he said.”I know how that is.” she said. “Personaly I would rather be reading more Winnie the poo. I have had a lot of time for that.” He told her. ” I perfect Clifford the big red dog but that’s just me!”she said. They laughed.
Derek’s dad entered the auditorium. He saw Derek and lexi talking. They were being very playfull. His dad did not recognize her. He observed that they had quite a report. His dad went over to see them. Derek was embarissed about holding her hand. He retracted it. She retook it. He tried several times to get it free. She would have none of it
“Hi dad! ” Derek said. ” who is this?” the pastor asked. ” this is lexi. Lexi this is my dad,” Derek said. ” pastor Bryan Carlson.  It is nice to meat you. “He said . ” it is good to meet you!” she said.
” I am glad your hear. We are a smal church but we have a really good group. I am pleased to see how the Lord is working hear. ” he said. ” it seams like a very friendly church. “She said.
Derek”s mom came in. She was holding the baby. She went over to them. “Hello I’m Anna Carlson. I am Derek’s mom.this is Savannah. ” She said. “I’m Lexi!” she said. ” it is a good to meat you. ” Anna said. ” is lexi short for alexis?” Derek asked.”alexsa but I never go by it.” she said. Lexi smiled at the baby. The baby smiled back. “So how do you know each other ? “Derek’s dad asked .
” she goes to Tom and denise’s church. ” he answered . ” I see.”the pastor said. ” are you Pentecostal?” Anna asked. ” yes I am. I would never try to influence. I respect his view. ” she said. ” I am glad you came  tonight. “Pastor Carlson said.”it is good to meet you. “Anna said
He gave up trying to get his hand back. ” am I making you nervous?” she asked .” maybe a little. I am very reserved. Its ok. ” he told her.
She liked his father’s preaching. He preached on the blood of Christ. She was an avid note taker. She took a million notes. After church they went to the parsnege to chat.
“What?” Derek asked.” your cute when your nervous. ” she said. He chuckled.” I had no idea. ” he said. “Get use to it dere. I intend to shake things up. ” she said. ” thanks for the warning. ” he said. ” I admit it.I am a hand full. ” she told him. “I will keep that in mind. ” he responded.
“What are reading for deviotions?”she asked. “I just started Romans . it is one of my favorite book of the bible. I am in Romans three. What are you reeding right now ?” he asked her. 
“Why now I am reeding though Mathew. I am in chapter 18 right now. ” she said.” your not reading though acts ? ” he asked. “Funy! I do like the book of acts. I do study it frequently!” She said “especially acts chapter two?” she asked. “It is an important chapter?” she said. “Not as much as you Pentecostal hep it up to be. ” he said.
“So is first Corinthians 13: 8-10 your life verses? ” she asked. “My life verse is to Romans 8:1 and 2.  ” he said . “I love that verse. I love that whole chapter. Why do you like it?” she asked. ” when I first studied thought the book, it really gave me an understanding of the Christian life. It is tied into me making my faith my own. Reading though chapter seven can be hard.I never told anyone but that was me realizing how awful sin was but being unable to conqur it. It was not serious sin at least it was the world’s eyes. I knew that any sin is bad. Coming to Romans 8. Realizing the power of the holy sprit the secret ingredient of the Christian life. ” he said.
He got a little emotional. He did nor realize it but it had really opened up he had just made himself venerable. She realized she had just got a glimpse of the real him. He was melting her heart.
“It sounds like you have really studied though Romans!” she remarked.”if I become a pastor , I definently intend to preach though the book. ” he said. “I look forward to hearing it. ” she said.
“What us your favorite verse or pasege?”he asked. “John one. I love how it ties Jesus to creation. I could live in John one. ” she said. “I know what you mean. I share your passion for it. I definitely want to preach from John one . ” he said. “Good !” she said.
” do you see those two ,” Derek’s dad asked. “I do. You see the way they look at each other? I know that look!” Anna said. “I have seen it before myself. ” he said. “They do make a cute couple!” she said. “They do. Do you think anything will come of it? ” he asked. ” yes I do. ” he said.
“I do too. Another Pentecostal in the family. Oh well. ” Anna said. “She does seem really sweet. I don’t think she will try to steer Rick away from the I.f.b. I don’t think he could. ” he said.”I am not worried about that. Look it’s like they have known each other for years. ” she said.
” it’s funny everyone was worried he would never get married or if ge would meet someone. He use to say that he did not want to rush the Lord. Perhaps he feel free to peruse her. ” Anna said. ” she seems nice. ” he said.
“Tom and Denise said you have really grown in the Lord over the past few years. What brought that about?” she asked. ” the church had a revival meeting. We had an evangelist from the south speak. The thrust of his mesege was that a godly heritage does not gurente that the next generation will live for God. Examples from scripture was Noah son,Solomon’ son,the son of Hezekiah etc. He said that everyone had to chose for themselves rather or not that they would serve the lord. I have not told anyone this either but I had been fighting with the lord a lot just before that mesege. I believe I was saved but I was not surrendered to the Lord. That was I gave up. That was when I agreed to go into ministry. I have never regretted it. ” He said.
“When was that? ” she asked. ” April about three years ago. Why?” he asked.She pulled out a peace of paper. She read it.” I have compelled to pray for my future husbend. I feel that he has an important decision to make. I don’t what it is but I am sure it is a big decision. I hope he makes the right one. I am praying that he will chose to follow the Lord. I chose to believe better things. I know that the Lord is able to complete the work he started in him. I wish I knew the outcome. I will ask him about it when I meet him. “She said.
” are you sure that you wrote that about me?” he asked. “Yes I’m sure. Before the word was given. I suspected it was you.now I’m sure. ” she said. ” that could change. I am accident prone. I snore and occasionally talk in my sleep!” he said. “I will a just!” she said..
“Eventually the warm and fuzies will ware off. I only read the kung James. I don’t listen to k-lov9. I believe In separating from non I.f.b. I am not sure you know what your getting into. ” he told her.
“It is a possibility that I don’t know what I am getting into. I only ask that you are submitted to Christ. Love Me as Christ loved the church. The rest will short itself out. ” she said.
” it is getting late.”he said. ” I should be going. I love talking to you. I can’t wait to see you again !”she said. “Have a good night. ” he said. She hugged him. She then kissed him on the cheek. He watched her get in the car and drive off.
End of part three

Holding hands part two

Derek and lexi walked hand in hand to his car .”I have known for a while that God had someone in mind for me. I have been praying for you. I have written you letters. I am so glad to be able to finally meet you. ” she said.
“Are you sure that I am the person your supposed to marry?” he asked.”if course I am. My sprit confirms it. You really put my mind at ease. ” she said. ” as I said earlier I am committed to fundamental Baptists . I need you to realize that. “He said.
“I know all about Baptist. I know all. That you don’t speak in tongues. “She said .
“That does not brother you? ” he asked. “God has brought us together. I know he has a plan for our lives. I trust him. He would sort all this out. ” She said.
“I have done a lot of study.  I have come to my views though careful study. Whatever churches I plant or pastor will reflect those views. ” Derek said.
“I figured. I am on your side. We will figure this out together. We are both believers that seek to be close to the Lord. Lets be on this journey together. ” she said.
She spoke very softly but was very determined at the same time. She started to melt his heart. He did not get it. Why was he even considering this? He parked the car. The two of then got out of the car. They got out. She temporarily let go of his hand but quickly took it back. They walked inside hand in hand.
She was cleving to the man she believed would be her future husband. They were in his mind one flesh. They met up with Tom,Denise and there family. She got a mocha ice code with extra mocha. That made him chuckle. He got black coffee with no cream or surger. He insisted on paying. They went to the table.
She put her arm around Him. “You two are really cute!” Denise said. “You two really are. ” Tom said.Derek wanted to throw something at Tom. He decided that that would be inappropriate. Why would Tom be encourage this?
“So did you grow up hear?”she asked. “No I was born in a smal town in Indiana. My dad started a church there. We lived there until I was five. Then went to a town in Pennsylvania where he started another church. We were there until I was 13. Then we moved hear. “Derrek said.
“Do you consider this home?” she asked. “”Yea I do. I don’t remember Gray Indiana. I remember beret pensivania. I gues I do consider this home. My most vivid memories happened hear.”he said
“Where are you from originally?”he asked. “I was born in Michigan. Lived in the same town. This is the first time I have left. “She said.
“Are you s student at sprit of fire?”he asked. “Yes I am. Are you a student at fundimenle Baptist college?” she asked. “Yes. I am in pastoral ministry tract. ” he said. “I am in a ministry tract I gues you would say. We do things quite a bit differently in a Pentecostal bible college. While much of it may not translate into a Baptist pastors wife I thunk Manny would. I have had life experiences that would help me fil the role of a pastors wife. ” she said.
“Is your dad a pastor?” Derek asked.” he is. He started out as a youth pastor but later became a Sr.pastor.” he said.
“It must be hard to be away from home?”he asked. “It is. I am not sure who it is harder for. My dad and step mom or me. ” she commented.
Derrek noticed that she got really tense when she mentioned her dad and step mom. He did not want to ask. He saw the hurt in her eyes. Itwa s weird he wanted to run and hide, at the same time he found himself troubled that she was troubled.
“Have you always wanted to be a pastor?” she asked. “Hardly. Derek has always been shy and reserve. He preferred to Be behind the scenes. For a while he wanted to Be a race car driver.” Derek said. He blushed. “What made you decide to be a pastor?” she asked.
“I was saved when I was five. I believe it was genuine but it Was only a few years ago that I really surrendered. I was never rebellious but I was not fully committed. I had not planed to attend bible college. At a bible college I Was challenged. The speaker said to abandon anything that keep from God’s best. I remember thinking ok Lord I get it. I just said I do what you want me to do.” he said .
“He really changed after that. He has grown a lot in a short amount of time.”Tom said.”God is definitely at work in his life. “Denise said. “I can see that. It is very evident.”she said. There eyes met. He was not sure he wanted to look at her that closely.
“So did you grow up in the church?Were you saved at a young age?” derrek asked. “I was saved when I was six. My dad led me to the Lord. He has been an inspiration for me. I have known for a while that I was supposed to be in some kind of full time ministry. I did consider doing something else but I am glad I did end up hear. “She said.
“Annie needs a diaper change. Do you want to come?” Denise asked. Lexi said yes and went with her. The two left. Tom’s som stayed close to Tom.Derek waited until they were out of earshot. “What are you doing?” Derek asked .” what do you mean?” Tom asked. “Why are you encoureging all of this?” Derek asked. “You don’t want me to?”Tom asked .”of course not!”Derek said.
“Why not?”Tom asked. “Well for starters I am a hymn only ,k.j.v separatist independent fundamental Baptist who believes that tounges have ceased as a viable gift of the holy sprit. How can I even consider dating a penticoastal let alone marrying one? How can I believe that ‘Word’ was from the lord? I don’t believe in prophecy!” he said
“I get that. I grew up in the same world you did. If you could see the way you two look at each other. You two have something. Set aside the prophecy, you two have a chemistry Rick. You two have the same chemistry nese and I do. Not only that, you two seam to have the same elements that mom and  dad do. “Tom said.
“I find that hard to believe. ” Derek said. “If you see yourselves from our angle ,you would not. ” he said.
Denise and lexi and the baby walked back to the table. Lexi kissed him in the cheek. He tried to hide his discomfort. She acted like they were already married.
She took his hand. She was totally committed to him now. He ignored it. He dismissed it. She wanted him to know his commitment. She wanted him to totally trust him.
“So do you have an idea where you want to live?” she asked. “No I am open to wherever. I want to start new churches in areas with little or no gospel witness.I don’t have a town or sate in mind. Do you have a preference?” Derek asked. “No I don’t!”she said.
After a while they decided that it was time to call it a night. They said there goodbyes to Tom and his family. Derek and lexi went to his car. “I am so glad to have met you. I am so excited to get to know you more. My Spirit is invigorated. I have a feeling I will always feel special around you. ” she told him.
He wished that he could calm down her exurburebce. All attempts to get her to back off failed miserably. He found he was having trouble just running away. He drove her back to the church parking lot. “I will give you my phone number and I want yours. “She said. “Sure!” he said. They exchanged phone numbers. She hugged him.
” it is so good to meet you. I have waited a long time for this day. I will be seeing you.”she said.she kissed him on the cheek. She got out of the car. She walked to the car. He watched her drive off. He had no idea how to react to all of this.
He turned up the CD.  It was a collection of hyims from one of his college choral groups. It helped him calm down. Right now He was prety tense. He had no idea how to react to all of this.
He parked and excited the car. He walked to the porch and then went inside. “How was the Pentecostal church? “His dad asked. “Um! Interesting. To say the least. It is a night I won’t soon forget. ” he said.
“You ok Rick you sesm worked up?”His farther asked. “I am a bit I gues. I will be ok. I might need to listen to a message from Dr. Bob Sr and Oliver p green but I will be fine. “Derek said”ok I am hear for you if you need to talk!” his dad said. He thanked him. Then he went upstairs.
End of part two.

Holding hands

Darrek Carlson was a pastoral student at an independent fundamental Baptist college. His farther was the pastor of a smal Baptist church. He was being mentored by his dad. He was acting as an asistent. He assisted In Visitation,he preached and engaged in orther duties. He showed sign of sprituel growth and a maturity. His whole church was behind him going into ministry.
Darrek has seven siblings. His second oldest brother Tom has become a Pentecostal. His wife was a life long Pentecostal. Despite doctrinal differences Darrek and Tom were close. Tom had been trying to get Darrek to come to a service on Saturday night. He had been very reluctant but finely relented.
Derrek felt out of place. He was used to Waring a suit and tie to church. Most men at sprit church wore a pollo suit and jeans. Derek wore a polo shirt and tan pants.this was his version of dressing down. That was as far as he went.
He went into the auditorium. He looked around for his brother and family. He saw Tom and Denise. He went over to them.  “You really came !” Tom said. “I said I would. So far I have not melted ” Darrek said.
For some reason,this New commer caught the attention of a young women who sat near Tom and Denise. ” did you think you would melt?” lexsi asked. “My brother Derek hear is a fundamental Baptist. He is a bit taken aback by us .” Tom said.
“Despite your objections,you stil came?” lexsi asked. “I think the world Of Tom even though he is the black sheep of the family. ” Derek said jockingly. “Personaly I think I am the normal person in the family but that’s just me. ” he said
“You are stil close?” lexsi asked .”yes we are. We think the other person is nuts but we are close. . Darrek answered.
“I think he looks up to me.”Tom said.  Well I would not go that far. For wisdom I go to our dest brother Rob. ” Darrek said.
“Our oldest brother Rob is the president of a very strict bible college. Nice guy but a bit dull. For wisdom He is probably more credible! ” Tom said.  “Probably?” Derek said.
“I am Sory you have to witness this but this is normal for us. We really do get along. ” he said. “I can see that. ” lexsi said .”I have gotten use to there banter. ” Denise told her.
“Hi by the way I’m Alexsa but everyone calls me lexsi. ” she said. “Hi I’m Darrek. ” he said. “She is a strong member of our church and is very active. ” Tom said.
Darrek got the feeling that Tom was trying to set the two of them up. He tried to move pass the comment. She seemed nice but she was not his type. That was what he told himself at the time.
“Derek is going to bible college.he wants to pastor churches.” Tom said. “I see!” She said.
The service started. The music was what was known as praise and worship. The kind you might hear on k love or other Christian music stations. Everyone seemed to be into it. Manny raised there hands and danced. Lexsi was into it. He felt really out of place. He felt like he was on a different planet.
It seemed to go on forever. It was not so bad he thought. Then the worship time was concluded. He was happy about that. Then the Sr. Pastor took to the pulpit. He did some customary greetings. Then he said something that would change both lexsi and Derek’s lives forever.
” before I begin tonight’s mesege ,the Lord has put something on my heart. I believe it is something I need to declare. ” pastor Jeff said.
Darrek had no ideal what was going on. He knew that The Pentecostal believed in getting words from the Lord. Derek did not believe that God communicated prophecy in thus age. He held his tounge. “This too shall pass” he told himself.
“I love when the Lord imparts wisdom to a believer. These. Are of the kind I enjoy. ” the pastor said.
The pastor of the church walk though the pews. He came to the row where Derek and lexsi were.
Derek had no idea what was going on. As pastor Jeff got closer,Darrek was getting more and more nervous. He stoped where the two were. “The Lord wants me to tell both of you that before you were born He declared that the two of you should be a couple. You will bring glory to him though your marriage. He created you both with talents and abilities that would compliment each other. You will fill In each others gaps. You will be able to relate to each other in a way no one else will. ” the pastor said.
“The Lord is pleased with this coupling. He wants you to embrace one another . you Wil start churches. You are gifted with preaching and teaching. She is an asset. You will discover this to be true. I am excited for you too. I know will do great thing though you” the pastor of the sprit church said.
Derrek had no ide how to react to this.He wanted to run away and hide. He saw no way to get out just now. His heart raced. He was really anxious .
Lexsi was excited. She a ended something in him the moment he g it there. She suspected that he would be important in her life. She enjoyed. His humor.she liked his bantor. He was fun. Without really thinking about it consciously she took his hand. She placed his hand in hers. It felt right. She felt safe with him. She fully embraced the thought of marrying him.
When he heard the word, he was stunned. He was In disbelief. He could not believe what was happening. His first visit to a Pentecostal church and now this happends. He hoped that while this was awkward in a few year’s this would be a distant memory. It might even be humorous. He wanted this whole night to end. He felt like he was trapped and unable to leave.
Then it got even more complicated. She smiled at him. He did not want to look her In the eye. He did not want her to see him. He felt really vulnerable  right now. He did not like being vulnerable I’m front of others.
Why did she take his hand he thought. They had literally just met. He wanted to remove his hand from hers. He suspected that this was not s good idea. While He was uncomfortable he did not want to hurt her. He did care for her. He decided not to try to get his hand back for now.
It appeared that why he has some doubts ,  in realty a lot of doubts. Lexsi did not share those doubts. It seemed that She fully embraced it and him.
He considered running. He suspected that she might run with him. What was he going to do. He was not romanticly involved with anyone . it had been a while sense he was. He did not take any of this seriously. How could he?  The Lord did not work this way In this dispensation. 
She held his hand though the entire messege. He tried to focus on the mesege. This was turning out to be a very unusual night.
She never left his side during the service. He believed that physical contact should happen over the course of a relationship. They were not even a couple yet. She did not seam ruling to remove her hand from his.
She seemed sweet. He wanted to marry a fellow independent fundamental Baptist . she was not in his mi d a suitable candidate to be his future wife. Right now she was not going where.
Tom wondered what Derek was thinking . Tom was prety sure that he was extremely uncomfortable. They looked so cute together. Tom knew he should not bring it up right now.
Derek liked the message.he found it to be fairly bible based. Pastor Jeff was not as good as his dad or some of the professors at college but it was not bad. He hoped that he could get right out of there.
“I kinda suspected that you would play a key role in my life. I did not fully understand it but it all makes sense now..I pledge to be s godly wife . I will support you and will be your friend and confident. You can count on me” lexsi told him.
He started to blush. He was beyond embarrassed. He really wanted to go home . he was trying to find a way to get yo the exit.
” lexsi I can assure that Derek is a godly person. I have no reservation about recommending him. He is a person character and character. ” Tom said.
Derek hoped that Tom would run Interference for him. Tom was not going to help him. The opposite was happening. Tom was encouraging all of this.
“Derek lexsi is a keeper.she Is known for being an encouragement. I know she will be an asset..” Denise said.  
Derek could not believe this was happening. Just when he thought it could not possibly get any weirder it did. He felt like the Baptist version of the twilite zone.
“I trust you. I know you will seek the Lord In all you do. ” lexsi said. “Do you want to join us for coffee?” Tom asked.
.oh I don’t know. Mayby another night. “Derek suggested. “Come on Derek. It wi be fun. “Denese suggested. “It will give us Chance to get to know each other. ” she suggested.
He felt surrounded. He just wanted To go home.he wished that Tom had backed him up. This was a fight or flight situation and he wanted to flea. There did not appear to be any way to flea at least right now. ” ok !” Darrek said.
“Can I go in your car? ” lexsi asked.” ok!” Darrek said . “we Will meet you there. ” defense said. They walked hand in hand to the car.
To be continued.